It's time to chat about...CHATTING

"I’d be really interested to know how you move your student into the yoga practice if they really want to ‘chat’ at length about what’s going on in their lives at that moment?!"

 

“I usually end up chatting for about 15 or 20 minutes before we start the yoga practice, and since I want to give them the full hour they paid for, I usually end up going over at least 20 minutes. Is that okay?”

I hear these questions from teachers ALL THE TIME. Maybe you have some questions like this for me also?

Well, here is the short answer:: NO. This is not okay.

Here is the longer one::

You have heard me go on and on about how the depth of private yoga work is centered around your relationship and feelings of trust between you and your client. How can you do that if you don’t spend 20 or more minutes chatting before and after the session?

This spans several topics I cover in depth my teacher training including the boundaries of time, emotional boundaries, and the best way to build relationships, so there is clearly much I could say on this topic {approximately eight hours worth of talking...}

I’ll be brief::

The more a client is able to share with you about what is most present in their lives, minds, and bodies, the better equipped you are to create sessions that meet their deepest emotional, physical, and spiritual needs. So yes, if a client is willing to “chat” with you, and share what is going on for them, that is really useful information and you should be soaking it up. It may seem like what your client really needs is a kind ear and a place to vent. I don’t doubt that they need that, but you also have lots of other tools to be able to help them feel better (or more aware, present, relaxed, awake) and can do much more to facilitate change and offer support other than just “listening”. There are other professionals who are trained to listen, and unless you are a therapist or counselor, that is not your role.

If there is something serious and important taking place in a client’s life, I think you can get all the information you can skillfully use to create a really meaningful session in under seven minutes.

Yup, I’m giving you seven minutes (or less!) to gather as much information as you can, and then you have got to get into their bodies.

They may need help to stop talking. Many of us do, myself included (!) when I’m on my acupuncturist’s table. If they need your help, please try this:

The moment you can get a word in edgewise, say, “Wow, that is so intense. I am so sorry. How is your body holding up through all this?” or, “Where are you feeling that in your body?”

And then they will say, “Yeah, you know, my neck has just been killing me.” or “Well, I haven’t been able to sleep so I’m just exhausted...”

and, Bam! Now they are handing you problems you have the solutions to.

If you find your client really wants to gab about more trivial chatter, there at at least two options here.

One:: They do not feel like doing the serious work of being present. If that is the case, I bet there is a way to make the session feel more lighthearted without gossiping about Prince William and his bride. {I have a client that loooves to try to talk about them ;) }

Two: They are not feeling fully seen by you and are {unconsciously} acting out for more attention. If you can find a way to be more nurturing and present for them, this will help.

Alright y’all. Share with us here. Is this something you struggle with? Do you find these tips helpful?